can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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