Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
