I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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