she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
