one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Randomize
