yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
