I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
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