i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
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