Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Randomize