But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
We just shotgunned beers for America
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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