Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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