Are we in a gay sports bar?
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
