Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(847): View more from Illinois

Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.

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(714): View more from California

Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.

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(850): View more from Florida

She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.

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(231): View more from Michigan

I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself

(1-978): View more from Massachusetts

You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection

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