Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
