You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
