Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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