So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
