Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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