For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
