he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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