White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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