At least make sure they are 18
Why
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
