So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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