I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
We are two peas in an std pod
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
