I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
I enjoy the company of your penis
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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