im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
