elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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