She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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