I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize