Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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