1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
