First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Good news!! I can adult!! π turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ππ
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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