Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
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