Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(519): View more from Ontario

turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep

(732): View more from New Jersey

sorry. that wasn't for you

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(905): View more from Ontario

Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech

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(719): View more from Colorado

Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.

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(212): View more from New York

how are things with the new girl?

(917): View more from New York City

good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".

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(952): View more from Minnesota

My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo

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(772): View more from Florida

Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?

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