You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
