I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
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