i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
