This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Randomize