the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Randomize
