Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
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