I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
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If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
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I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?