Please, let me fuck your mom
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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