Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I would ride that face into the sunset
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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