why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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