so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
