Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
