Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
this just has baby written all over it
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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