I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
