I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
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