dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Randomize
